I am SO thankful to have this weekend behind me. It wasn't easy, especially for Kevin. Luz Andrea went home Saturday morning, or at least left her American home Saturday morning. She didn't make it to her Mexican home until very early Sunday morning. It was an exciting day for her, and I have no doubt we will see her again. Jack easily settled back into his "only-childness." The house was exceptionally quiet, and I'm not sure why. Luz isn't usually a loud person. Maybe it was just knowing she wasn't present. I was so tired and completely washed out that all I did besides sleep and eat was go to church Sunday morning. We had breakfast with Mr. Myron and Mrs. Rita afterward, and it was difficult for me to be a part of the conversation. I enjoyed visiting with them and being out of the house, though. The rest of the day was filled with sleep, until the NBA championship game that evening. I was able to sit up and watch that with Kevin, while texting Luz Andrea. Very proud of my Celtics!

Today began with a terrible headache. Those are no longer surprises. I was able to focus, though, and make some progress at work. I always welcome the routine of the week after chemo. I don't know why why. I think I've always been the kind of person who can handle the tough stuff, if I just know to expect it.  I can deal with it, if I know it's coming, like a lineman bracing himself for the hike of the football.

Jack had a great day at school, followed by an even better evening at t-ball. He was ready to be part of the team, despite the extreme heat. He stopped a couple balls, batted well, didn't leave the field mid-inning, and had a great attitude. I don't expect one season of 4 year old t-ball to turn him into an athlete, but I do expect him to learn to do his best. He did that tonight, never complaining of the heat. He even managed to pick a few weeds for mommy while manning 3rd base.  :)  

The highlight of my day was on the way to the ballgame. We took Bogey, our new Scottie puppy, for his first public outing. Jack has been calling Bogey a "her" even though he is not. On the way there, he referred to Bogey as a "her." I explained to Jack, again, that Bogey is not a girl. Bogey is a boy. I explained to my sweet little four year old what makes Bogey a boy dog, and it's not his blond hair. Jack has two blond cousins, Mallory and Savannah. I think that's where he gets it from. He started to connect the dots, saying Bryce has blond hair. "Yes, that's right, and Bryce is a boy." He jumped in his mind to, "Mommy is a girl, and she doesn't have blond hair." (Right now, I have don't have any.)  The cutest part was when he said, "Mommy, you don't have blond hair. You just have blond skin." Precious moments. I guess my fair skin is blond compared to his. I'm so glad I was able to make it to his game tonight.  I would have missed out on this whole conversation. Again....it's the small things that make life special.

The second surprise of the day was when we returned to the house after the game. Kevin found a package outside! Inside were several cool Cindy surprises from Traci M. Thank you so much! First of all, you were right ON with the red and polka-dots. I absolutely love the little travel bags and Lindi lotions, right up my alley! I'll definitely be able to use them when I travel to SLC in July. Jack thought the picture file was was "awesome," his own words. Even the little luggage tag was fun. I resisted the urge to buy one just the other week when I was window shopping with Luz. My favorite surprise inside was the sunhat. SO cute! I can't wait to wear it! You know me SO well! I'm hoping we get to meet face to face in Alabama later this week. You were so sweet to think of me. Thank you. :)

Treatment Week 1

Well, I really didn't intend for it to take a whole week for me to enter another blog. I think the nausea medication, which I am extremely thankful for, really has caused quite a bit of exhaustion. I'll try to catch you up as best I can. Hopefully, the blogs won't be so far apart next time.

Before I had chemo, I didn't really know what to expect. I'm not sure I ever even tried to picture it. So, for those of you who don't know, I'll describe treatment 1A for you from Monday. If you already know, you may want to skip this paragraph. My treatments are received in a room that looks very much like a large hotel lobby. It's very comfortable, but cold. There are 14 red recliners, each with a colorful blanket draped over the back. There is a little coffee table beside each chair. The chairs are arranged in two circular settings with IV poles all around. The treatment room has lots of windows. The lighting is natural with calming apricot and aqua wall tones. Snacks are available...water, juice, crackers, cookies, chips, etc...The best part about the chemo room is the oncology nurses, Jerri and Jill. They rock! I can tell you without a doubt they have found their calling. I won't have my port until early May, so I received my first cycle of treatment through IV. It wasn't bad, but I hate to admit that I think having a port will make it easier for us all. Jerri took care of me Monday. She explained every little think she did. What chemicals I was receiving, how they would make me feel, what to watch for, how long it would take, when my hair would fall out, what to do about it. You name it...she was my "chemo mom." Kevin went with me Monday. If you know him at all, you know he NEVER sits still. He was free to come and go from the chemo room as he needed to make work calls and stretch his legs. I know he would love to do more, but he can't. I love him so much. We were gone from about 9am til 3:30pm Monday. Really no appetite at all that day. Forced myself to eat some cream potatoes with cheese for dinner, peanut butter and crackers earlier in the day. Grandma stopped by for a brief visit with surprises for Jack and me. Thanks, G'ma.

When you take chemo, it's important that you drink plenty of fluids to rid your body of the toxins, like 2-3 liters per day in my case. I focused so diligently on drinking the water that I forgot to drink any caffeine. My head was killing me by 7pm. I'm a Dt. Mtn Dew addict you know. It didn't really occur to me until later that night it was the lack of caffeine, not the chemo, that was causing such a horrendous headache. I got no rest. Tuesday, I was more watchful of my caffeine intake. Unfortunately, I don't like Dt. Mtn. Dew any more. Everything tastes like a melted fork when I eat it. 

Mom did a very special favor for me Monday night. I know it was hard for her. She shaved my head. It will need to be shaved closer, but this was a good start. We saved all my hair in a zip-lock bag. When my cancer is gone, I plan to celebrate by releasing my hair for the birds to use.  My sister and her family were able to watch via skype. Jack watched while we did it. I told Jack and Mallory that I wanted to cut my hair short like Jack and Uncle Tony's to see if it would grow back curly like Mallory's (Jack's 4 year old cousin). I'm glad I allowed them to watch. I think it was good for us all. My mom handled it very well I think, better than I would have. We videoed it. I'll see about posting it to the blog. Then, I read a book to Jack called Mommy without Hair? that Kevin checked out of the West Clinic library for me. Jack really liked it. I had put my wig on, yes I have two, but Jack made me take it off. (smile) The main character in the book is four-year-old Jack. His mom has cancer.

Tuesday was even longer. Mom took me to chemo on day 1B. Kevin was able to work and Grandma took care of the kids. It took five hours for the Taxol to infuse, which is expected. It starts slow to avoid reaction, then they speed it up. It's odd to sit and watch clear toxins drip into your body one at a time and know that it is actually going to save your life. Reminds me of an Alanis Morissette song..."Isn't it ironic..." I was especially tired Tuesday. I finally fell asleep 30 minutes before my infusion. It was a good nap though. Mom said I was smiling, talking to angels is what she calls it. I think it was comforting to her. It was also good for her to see what happens in chemo. I took a really long nap when we got back home. It was Jack's very first T-ball practice. I wanted to go see it so badly. I almost didn't make it, but in the end God gave me the strength. I was even able to go out on the field and help the lil sluggers wait for their time to bat from the tee with Kevin. Jack did well. I'm so proud of him. It's going to be so much fun to see him play. He is one of the two smallest kids out there; his birthday came in time by only 1 week. FYI...he no longer approves of being a "little boy." He is now a "biggun."

Wednesday finished out day three of my first chemo cycle. Eight more to go. Mom took me again so Kevin could work. I think he got a lot accomplished. Mom took me to lunch at Harvey's for lunch. I didn't want any food, but again, I'm forcing myself to get the protein down. I ordered the Grouper Almondine....YUMMY! This is the best meal I've had all week! Still thinking about it. I think I'll have potatoes with it next time, the rice pilaf was too strong for my taste buds.  It was fantastic! Definitely on my chemo week menu now. We thoroughly enjoyed our meal, and were pleasantly surprised at the end to be told that there was no bill. I'd like to take this opportunity to thank some dear old friends of the Riley family. You know who you are. I was able to stay up late and catch up some email Wednesday night. Mom went home Wednesday afternoon, but plans to returns soon. It was really nice having her here. I love you, Mom!

I was happy to be able to do that. I hate feeling like I have something hanging over my head. I didn't eat dinner with Kevin or the kids. I know they missed me, but understood. Instead, the magnificent Luz Andrea warmed my dinner in the microwave. I was a little nervous about this, she is a novice chef, but my chicken and potatoes were just right. I am going to miss her so much. Luz is much more than an exchange student to our family, she is part of it. Sometimes she is my daughter, sometimes my friend, but always family. I'm going to miss her silly ways.

Thursday...I didn't hurt. I was slow and lethargic. My brain and body didn't cooperate well together. I could tell my brain was more sluggish, frustrating for a control freak. Nonetheless, we made it though another good day. I had to take a few naps to get through the day, though. Luz was MVP when it came to keeping Jack busy, as was her partner in crime from Germany, Marie. So, Thursday was mainly work, sleep, eat, work, eat, sleep. I expected back and leg pain that day, and thought I had gotten away without it. It's a side-effect of one of my drugs. No such luck...started this morning. It's not so bad though. I am managing it just fine.

Thank you all for your love and support, I do read all your replies, even when I am too tired to respond. :)